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 This Topic is now locked You can reapply July 24th 2013

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So can i Join
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No
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Maybe
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Total Votes : 2
 

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SunsetShimmers



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Join date : 2013-06-24

PostSubject: This Topic is now locked You can reapply July 24th 2013   Mon Jun 24, 2013 3:41 am

Do not edit this topic anymore all edits after mine will be ignored when it is time you need to post a new topic with the Title saying Sunset Shimmers App




Full (furcadia) Name: Sunset Shimmers

Alias/Nickname: Sunset or Shimmer

[b]Name of alts we may know you as: Super Star and Blood Soul Devil


[b]Why do you want this character?:
Explain to us why you are choosing this character. 3-5 line preferred.  
I wanna be this Character cause i Love Sunset Shimmers plus i wanna rp as her and she is my favorite pony i think i can do a good job while rping as her and doing other kinds of things i can try my very best and that is what is importaint so i think i can actually do a good job to rp as her.

How often are you online?: We love hanging out with all the ponies who RP in the dream so let us know how offten you can come hang out. I am Online for like afternoon to 11pm or 12am my time

Gender:  Are you a Male or Female I am A Female

Species: What Species are you? I am a Unicorn

Age: young adult
If Under 13 or Foal age we need a mom and dad background: 

Cutie Mark: What is your Cutie Mark? it is a wavy sun with red and yellow colors

Generation: What Gen Are you? i am from generation 4

Special Somepony: Do you have a Special Somepony if so who? none

Pet: Do you have a pet if so what is there name? none

Residence: Where do you live? Canterlot

Workplace: Do you have a job if so where do you work? none

Occupation: If you have a job what is your Job Title? none

Short Introduction: If you where to met me randomly what would you want me to know about your pony the most? that i am Nice and Kind and Sweet

Backstory: Where does your pony come from what was there past like? it was horrible 

Apearance: What does your pony look like? She is yellow with red and yellow mane and tail and she is a unicorn with a wavy sun with red and yellow colors she has type of green eyes

Personality: Show us your knowledge of the character. She likes to be mean and rude she is very smart and likes to steal things and stuff she likes to steel Twilight's crown

Job: Tell me all about your ponies job? she has none

Equestria RP Alts: Do you RP other ponies in the dream please list there names here. none

Ref Image: A pic of your pony Soon

Sample Post: This better be your best work, as it's the most important part of the application. 4 line Min in Furc main chat screen

[/b][/b]
A Young Unicorn Filly had a hard past she didn't know what else to do she felt sick and ill all over but now she is fine and good she doesn't want any friends right now and she is very not in a good mood she sometimes angry for no reason plus she is very upset having a hard time to survive she is mostly angry all the time she wishes to have friends but not anymore she got her cutiemark somehow she also use to be a student of princess celestia so Celestia told Sunset to raise the sun and do more work  but sunset was getting tired of it all and started getting greedy and mad all the time so she didn't do it and celestia told her that she was banned so celestia banished sunset from going to ponyville and canterlot.


Last edited by Equestria on Mon Jun 24, 2013 10:29 pm; edited 7 times in total (Reason for editing : Topic Locked)
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Location : Georgia

PostSubject: Re: This Topic is now locked You can reapply July 24th 2013   Mon Jun 24, 2013 3:51 am

Okay, a few things strike me as a little off here.

One, Sunset Shimmer is an ex student of Celestia and therefore is probably Twilight's age or older. Fifteen seems a little young. Did you misunderstand and put your own age instead of the character's? I'd just put "young adult" there, if I were you.

Two, Sunset Shimmer is the antagonist of EqG. I have not had the opportunity to see the movie yet, but I imagine that means she isn't just "nice and kind and sweet." Antagonists usually have darker characteristics, too. Being resentful, for example.

That backstory is really weak. Tell us what actually happened.

As for the role play post, you should only be controlling your own character. In a situation like that, someone else would be playing Trixie, so you shouldn't specify Trixie's actions. Your sole concern should be Sunset Shimmer's actions.
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PostSubject: Re: This Topic is now locked You can reapply July 24th 2013   Mon Jun 24, 2013 10:24 pm

I'm sorry hunny but I will have to vote No on this app. I normaly only give ponies one try to fix a app and it clearly tells me you have had 5 edits on your app. You can reapply in a month. 

My advice is to look up your char try and find out as much as you can about her. Write out you Short Introduction, Background Story, and get up with a staff or a approved pony in the dream and have a few RPs you can start one in the OOC area if you want. 

Your Short Introduction needs to be like if my alt Heart Throb was to walk up to you on the road in Ponyville and say " Hello my name is Heart Throb. I'm the Hoofbinder of ponyville. I like to flirt and have fun. But what I like to do the most is hang out and meet new ponies and go on dates with handsome stallion. What about you? " Your short introduction would be whatever you respond to her saying. Be sure you include who you are. What you do as in if you are going to school or your job. And anything your char finds fun to do. You can also add in things you don't like if you want.

Your background needs to tell us alot more then what you said she got her cutie mark somehow by Celestia trying to get her to rase the sun. Thats a great start but tell us how she met Celestia and why it was that she was haveing her do that. You said she was Orphianed when she was younger. Thats a good start also but we need to know how was she orphianed and what happened to her mom and dad. You also made the remark she Quited and ran off into another dimension if we are to allow this in her story you need to tell us not only how she found her way to this other dimension but also how she got back.

And I can not say this enofe detail detail detail the more detail you add into anything the better from the way her eyes shine to the wind blowing thro her mine and tail and how it sways the more you add into any post the easy it is as readers for us to see it in our mind. That my dear is what RP is all about feeling like somthing is really happening being able to see it clearly and the more detail the better.
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